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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28923705">From the Eye of the Typhoon</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheDarkFlygon/pseuds/TheDarkFlygon'>TheDarkFlygon</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Caeca Fortuna (Bad Things Happen Bingo) [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Inazuma Eleven</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Character Interpretation, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Forgiveness, Friendship, Gen, Guilt, Headcanon, Injury Recovery, Major Character Injury, Minor Original Character(s), POV Second Person, Post-Canon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 13:02:53</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,736</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28923705</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheDarkFlygon/pseuds/TheDarkFlygon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>You lose control of your strength over thirty seconds and that's enough to break someone's future.<br/>And that's a lesson learnt the hard way.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Tachimukai Yuuki &amp; Tsunami Jousuke</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Caeca Fortuna (Bad Things Happen Bingo) [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2097189</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Bad Things Happen Bingo</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>From the Eye of the Typhoon</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>
  <em>It can take years to fix a mistake that was made in a moment. </em>
</p><p>Written for my Bad Things Happen Bingo card:<br/>https://thedarkflygon.tumblr.com/post/639403196939403264/here-is-your-card-for-bad-things-happen-bingo<br/>Prompt: It's All My Fault + Tsunami (ft. a lot of my personal canon)</p><p>I knew, the moment I saw that fic reach 3K words, it'd be a case like "Two Birds in One Stone" where the length of the fic had just slipped away from my reach. Almost 6K words on whatever this fic's premise is, is... quite the thing. It's magic, like soccer and friendship.<br/>I went overboard with the personal canon content on this one, man. Since it's set much later, stuff has had the time to happen, and it doesn't help this is technically part of a bigger storyline for a series. I'd have been more secretive about potential spoilers if I didn't expect said spoilers to happen in, like, 3 years. I also don't expect anybody to actually read this so... yeah. I don't think you even need to know about the few OCs mentioned in there to understand what's going on, which would be a sign I'm a competent writer.<br/>yeah. Have a very serious Tsunami and some BROTP angst content. I need to write these two more since they're such a comfort relationship for me to write. That's also where you really see how far from the canon of the anime I've strayed writing those fics and speculating on what could happen after the first series while ignoring at least half of Go's shenanigans. woops.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The air goes still, heavy and hot, smothering.</p><p>The stadium goes silent, cheers stopping in a second.</p><p>A dozen of gazes suddenly weigh on your shoulders, from all around you.</p><p> </p><p>The world stops.</p><p> </p><p>You know time didn’t stop the moment you realized you had fucked up, yet to you, it’s like the planet just started spinning the other way. You’re aware nobody has stopped moving just because <em>your</em> body freezes and your legs give in at the worst time. It’s all on you and you couldn’t ignore it, mostly because you’re not the kind to run away to begin with – if you need to face your faults, then you will – but this is different, isn’t it?</p><p>Once the shockwave of the situation has passed, you’ll be trialled for what you just did, even if it was on accident. After all, isn’t there some sort of accidental manslaughter charge existing out there? Yeah. Wasn’t planned, still happened. That’s what sucks about this: you never wanted this. You’d have never wished for something like that to happen.</p><p> </p><p>It’s like a nightmare became real right in front of your goddamned eyes and you were unable to do <em>anything</em> about it, no matter how much you internally screamed.</p><p> </p><p>All you can hear is your own heartbeat and voices around you.</p><p>
  <em>You shouldn’t have allowed this!</em>
</p><p>Tsukihime Serena. Tsukimori’s captain.</p><p>
  <em>I’m sorry. I had no idea this’d happen.</em>
</p><p>Toda Yuuichirou. Tsukimori’s second forward. Yokato’s ex-captain.</p><p>
  <em>Too late for regrets. That match ain’t stopping now.</em>
</p><p>Kimidori Sei. Tsukimori’s main midfielder. Tsukihime’s righthand woman.</p><p> </p><p>You’ve never spoken with any of these people – Tachimukai just told you about them over the Internet – but you feel like you’ve disappointed them as if you had disappointed your own teammates. You didn’t realize until now how much you knew these guys through those conversations: Tsukihime is a proud, fierce and headstrong captain. Kimidori is a little weird but she’s a loving kind of weird, like the Oumihara guys. Toda is a comforting presence and an amazing dormmate to have.</p><p>You know these guys. You know their tastes and their dislikes as if you had shared a class with them. You know their hobbies because they come up in their discussions and techniques. You know some of their backgrounds. You know how emotional some can get and how some can hold grudges for long times, so you know very well how furious they’ll get because you just hurt their youngest member because that’s how much they’ve adopted him into their ranks – Tachimukai has told you so.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>I’m the only first-year on the team, so… well, they just tend to get worried for me, you know? Back when I was in Yokato, my teammates were the same.</em>
</p><p>You sound bothered by that.</p><p>
  <em>Well… I don’t think it’s because they think I’m weak or anything, because otherwise I wouldn’t be playing as many matches as I get to with them, but I can’t help thinking back to what happened with InaJapan… I know they’re just being protective, though, that’s why I can’t resent them for it. They don’t know what happened back then anyway. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Tsukimori’s main goalkeeper, Kujaku – <em>she looks a little scary on the field, but she’s a really nice person</em>, you can hear Tachimukai tell you with a chuckle in his voice – comes to you and grabs you by the collar, screaming at you words you barely understand. Her eyes stare right into yours like two malachite daggers about to stab someone to death (which probably isn’t far from the reality of things), but her voice doesn’t register, and soon, someone stops her – it’s that bandana-wearing guy again.</p><p><em>He didn’t intend on injuring him, </em>Toda tells her as he retains her fist with his hands. <em>Look at him. He’s as devastated as we are.</em></p><p><strong><em>I don’t care!</em></strong> Her voice is so much louder than his, like thunder striking the ground. <strong><em>He still did it and that’s all that matters! Lemme handle this! </em></strong></p><p>
  <em>Please, Kujaku… you know Tachimukai wouldn’t want that.</em>
</p><p>She calms down, gives you a hand, and apologizes before heading for the now-empty goalpost.</p><p> </p><p>It’d seem like, during the time you weren’t looking, that your friend got carried away from the field. You didn’t even get that chance to apologize to him, which means you’ll have to do it later. The whistle prompts you to join back your side of the field no matter how unfocused you are and how little soccer is on your mind: how are you supposed to care about a match when <em>that</em> happened only a couple minutes ago?</p><p>It may have lasted for only seconds, yet it’s repeating on loop in your head. The moment <em>Reef Break</em> leaves your foot. The moment you see him charge up <em>Well of Time</em>, only for the ball to curve and prevent him from doing so. The moment it started to grind against his shoulder. The noises it kept producing. The nausea you got overwhelmed with. The muffled scream.</p><p> </p><p>You shouldn’t be here when you can break someone’s shoulder that easily.</p><p> </p><p>You didn’t get a red card (merely a yellow one – and that was because Kujaku would have murdered the referee if you got away scot-free) beg the coach to switch out of the field, the urge to dissolve into the sea getting stronger and stronger with each passing second.</p><p>
  <em>Tsunami, are you crazy? We need you for this match. We still need to score one point!</em>
</p><p>I’m sorry, coach, but I can’t. Not… not after what I just did.</p><p>
  <em>It was an accident, Tsunami. Everyone knows that.</em>
</p><p>But what if I injure someone else?! Even if I didn’t want to do that, I still… I still broke someone’s bones, did I?!</p><p>
  <em>Why are you this shaken? Injuries happen all the time in soccer, Tsunami. I’m certain you know that too, considering our team has been affected recently. </em>
</p><p>It’s… Ah…</p><p>
  <em>I don’t know what your relationship with Tsukimori’s goalkeeper is, or if you even know him to begin with, but whatever it is, you shouldn’t let it affect you. He knew what he was getting into when he decided to join a soccer team.</em>
</p><p>…Would that be your reaction if Norika got injured the way Tachimukai did? (The coach rises an eyebrow, looks bothered for a second, then gets back to his oh-so-serious demeanour).</p><p>
  <em>Oh, so you know that keeper enough to know his name.</em>
</p><p>Of course I do, we were teammates back in junior high! Crap, he’s the same age as my brothers. It’s like I injured one of them. If I can injure someone that close to me, I could seriously put everyone else in danger.</p><p><em>…Fine. </em>(He turns around). <em>Switch players! Replacing Tsunami Jousuke is Rinkaiseki Fumihara.</em></p><p>Thanks, Coach.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>Of all people, <em>Toda</em> comes to you after you’ve both exited the field and changed back into more society-appropriate clothing. His footsteps sound as firm as those could do, so you know you’re in for a bad moment, and for a bunch of reasons: this guy was Yokato’s captain and is Tachimukai’s current dormmate. If there’s one person who know the latter, it’s Toda.</p><p>If there was one person in search for some sort of retribution, for some catharsis no matter how small, right now, it’d be Toda.</p><p> </p><p>“Tsunami.”</p><p>You stop and turn back despite the anxiety raging in your veins.</p><p>“I didn’t apologize to you guys, right?” You just realized that, how classy of you, especially since you’re in third year.</p><p>“An apology isn’t what I came for. I just… feel the need to tell you about something.”</p><p>That <em>really</em> isn’t something you expected to hear, is it?</p><p>“And what would that be?”</p><p>“I’m also responsible for what happened today. I don’t want that to be ignored.”</p><p>Wait, <em>what</em>?</p><p>“What… do you mean?”</p><p> </p><p>Toda puts his hands on his hips.</p><p>“When we got told we’d be facing Tsukimori in the semi-finals, Tachimukai immediately got excited. None of us really understood why until I remembered you used to be in the same team as him. Back when were in Yokato, after the FFI ended, he told me about your training sessions. I thought that, if I had the opportunity, I’d let the two of you play it out again, with you shooting and him catching the ball. Isn’t that what you’d do?”</p><p>“Y-yeah, we’d do that, but… Why? You could’ve lost the match. And… well, you know what that lead to.”</p><p>“Believe me, I’m more than aware I let disaster strike here. But, tell me, did you ever intend on doing this?”</p><p>“What?! Of course not! I…” Your throat knots. You’re about to cry again, are you? “That was a nightmare I didn’t know I had!”</p><p>“And so do I. I let you do that and you made a mistake. Despite how furious I am, I can’t hold it against either of us. It’s either we both forgive ourselves or we take the blame together, Tsunami. I think, deep down, we both thought he was going to stop it.”</p><p>“…but the ball curved and it landed where it shouldn’t have.”</p><p>“Unpredictable outcome, isn’t it?” A girl screams Toda’s name from somewhere near. “Now, I apologize, I need to go. Just keep in mind that, of all people, I think Tachimukai will understand that wasn’t supposed to happen.”</p><p> </p><p>As you watch him leave and join his team’s ranks, you can’t manage to shake the guilt off yourself and, deep down, you know Toda can’t either – not with the apologetic tone of his voice, not with the anguish expression he was sporting when you were talking, not with the way he put the blame on himself more than he did on you.</p><p>You don’t get it, but Norika is calling for you, so you better get on with your day and keep all of that guilt to yourself. There’s no use in spilling it over anyone else now that everything has been said and done.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>His arm in is a sling, stuck right against his torso. If you had to compare it to something, you would have said it looked like an upgrade to how a broken arm is handled (like Etsuko had when she had fallen off the tree and spent at least an entire month with her arm like that and frustrated misery all over her face); but there’s no cast and something tells you it’s much worse than what happened with Etsu.</p><p>Much, <em>much</em> worse.</p><p> </p><p>You don’t know where to put yourself. You managed to make it all the way to that hospital before your team had to leave and return to Okinawa, to ask the receptionist where to go, to get there (despite your admittedly terrible sense of orientation in urban environments), and even to knock on the door, open it and sit in that room. And yet, even after doing all that, your vocal cords just won’t work because your brain is blanking out. That’s… no good.</p><p>Like, seriously, what you’ve got before your eyes is entirely your fault. You know you’re supposed to apologize for it – that’s all you had in mind last night. You couldn’t sleep for more than an hour at a time because of how scared you were for this moment, because of how inevitable this conversation would be; yet you’re frozen, intimidated, to the point you can’t even look at his face, your eyes barely managing to stay on the ugly sling to begin with.</p><p>
  <em>Better get on with it before the silence gets too heavy.</em>
</p><p> </p><p>“I’m so—”</p><p>“It’s okay, Tsunami.”</p><p>You lift your head, finally deciding to face the truth, when you realize he’s smiling slightly, despite the way his eyebrows are frowning. The guy’s been injured because of you and your blunder only, yet he’s <em>smiling</em> at you.</p><p> </p><p>Of all people, he’d be the one in the right position to go against you and push you away from him so you won’t cause any more harm; but that’d be forgetting you’re talking to <em>Tachimukai</em>, someone who’s forgiven a lot that would infuriate you back in the day.</p><p>
  <em>Aliea treating him like subpar cannon fodder. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Coach Hitomiko trying to force him back onto the field as a midfielder even if his hands bled.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Coach Kudou refusing to let him shine because Endou was oh so much better, switching players after throwing him onto the field with no rime nor reason.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Kogure mocking him for being a supposed copycat, ignoring how he had only two techniques to his name (and one of them was Touko’s and yours), sending him into a downward spiral.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>The team thinking of him as a mere placeholder player because <strong>Endou was oh so much better</strong>.</em>
</p><p>You’ve never seen him go against any of them despite how he felt about those topics. If anything, he should be more resentful now that you’re tearing him away from a team where’s never felt <em>any</em> of that. He was finally in his element with Tsukimori and… you brought all of that to an end.</p><p> </p><p>Why can’t this guy just<em> hate you and move on?</em></p><p> </p><p> “I know you didn’t mean it,” he continues to speak while you just <em>stare</em>, vision blurring. “I think it’s on me, actually.”</p><p>“You can’t be serious,” you drop with a deadpan. “I’m the one who shot that ball. I should’ve known a long-range shot from such a short distance was a bad idea. I’m your senior, ain’t I? It’s that sort of stuff I’m s’pposed to think about.”</p><p>The smile disappears.</p><p>“I’m serious, Tsunami. I don’t hold anything against you. I don’t want you to beat yourself over because of what happened yesterday. It’s not that big of a deal.”</p><p>“Really?”</p><p>That smile he’s trying to give you… It’s fake. It’s faker than the lemon scent of the school’s detergents and faker than snow white vanilla sugar.</p><p>“Yeah. I promise you, I’ll be fine once my shoulder heals.”</p><p>“…even if you won’t be ever able to play like that anymore?”</p><p> </p><p>Tachimukai immediately freezes, eyes open wide (well, wider – he looks like he’s been through hell).</p><p>“How do you…”</p><p>“I’ve overheard some staff before coming here.” You gulp, the weight of your words rendering your tongue heavier than it’s ever been. “You’re more injured than you’re trying to make me think, aren’t you?”</p><p>You’ve rarely seen him look this displeased over anything, bordering on despair.</p><p>“Please, don’t give a crap about my sensibility and be honest with me. What did you get?”</p><p>“Ha… a rotator cuff tear and… a glenoid fracture.”</p><p>“Uh… Sorry for being dumb, but what’s that?”</p><p>“It’s a part of the shoulder. It’s really rare, apparently, so… I don’t know how to explain it. I’m a little confused about it myself.”</p><p>“Sounds like a pain in the ass and a half.”</p><p>“…pretty much.”</p><p> </p><p>You <em>just so happen</em> to have broken that guy’s dreams with your own hands (well, foot, but you see the point), didn’t you?</p><p> </p><p>Tachimukai tries to chuckle the awkwardness of their conversation away, yet it soon turns into tears in his eyes and his voice breaking a little.</p><p>“Truth be told, I’m scared.”</p><p>“Scared of what?”</p><p>“Of being left behind, I think?”</p><p>“Who’d even do such a thing just because you’re injured? It wasn’t even your fault!”</p><p>Let’s simply ignore the fact you want this guy to hate you so he can leave <em>you</em> behind. He doesn’t need that sort of shit right now.</p><p>“I… I’m scared the team won’t need me anymore, I think, and… Never mind. It’s probably just me.”</p><p> </p><p>It’s an understandable fear, especially with what he’s seen people do to others once they stopped being “useful”. Someone with a shattered shoulder and a permanent handicap… wouldn’t be useful to a soccer team. He knows that. He’s seen it happen with other teams during high school-level tournaments such as the one Umizumi just lost in the semi-finals (and whose little finale he asked not to play because his hands still tremble thinking of what happened last time – as if it was forever ago when it’s been twenty-four hours at most).</p><p> </p><p>“How long are you staying in Fukuoka?”</p><p>“Ah, I’m leaving in, like, half an hour…I asked for a little time so I could pay you a visit.” </p><p>His face is one of someone who’s saddened, but not hurt nor furious – actually, shouldn’t he be relieved you’re leaving?</p><p>“It’s a little childish of me, but…” He chuckles to himself, but the way his eyes look aside as his left hand clutches the sling is telling. “I’m getting surgery for my shoulder and, well… I hoped you’d be around for it. I should’ve remembered you were only in Fukuoka for a match…!”</p><p>Surgery, huh… Yeah, it’s… as bad as you expected it to be.</p><p>“Sorry for that, dude. I could, I’d stay, but… Y’know, school obligations and all. I’ll… I’ll contact you after you’re done, okay?”</p><p>“Works me for. Thank you, Tsunami.”</p><p> </p><p>There’s got to be a way to fix your enormous error that isn’t erasing his timid smile from existence, right?</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>Your team watches the finale of the tournament after winning the little finale – but you can’t bring yourself to actually watch the show, instead looking aside, biting your lip.</p><p>You can’t bear to watch a match where a vital piece is missing.</p><p> </p><p>(Tsukimori High wins the yearly edition of Football Frontier Beyond).</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>There’s a lot he tells you over the phone that keeps reminding you of how much you need to fix that mistake of yours, despite the light-hearted tone he tries to say it in every single time. You’re not surprised you two have kept contact, considering how <em>he</em> wanted <em>your</em> presence by his side, and in a way, it’s much better this way; but you can’t help but get concerned whenever he mentions the consequences of the incident.</p><p><em>The surgery went well! The doctor’s told me recovery would be long, but I’ll get there. What I’m worried about, now, is when I’ll be back at the dorm. I hope it won’t be too bothersome for Toda… He told me he didn’t mind, but… </em>(Silence). <em>I haven’t had the occasion to tell him about the worst sides yet, haha… </em>(He updated you two hours later about the struggles of carrying two trays at the same time in the cafeteria).</p><p><em>I managed to get out on the day of the finale of the FF Beyond. I wish I could’ve participated in the group hug after the team’s victory, but… well, let’s just say I didn’t want my doctor to scream at me… </em>(Good move! Congrats on the win, by the way.) <em>Well, I didn’t do anything myself in the last match, but the team kept telling me I was part of the journey, so… thanks, I guess! </em>(He sent a picture of the team in your conversation. Kujaku was holding him under her arm like a mother hen and her chick. Sounds accurate).</p><p><em>Everyone looked at me funny when I came into class today. I guess it’s not every day you see someone with the sort of sling I have, right? I felt awkward having to type on a keyboard because I can only use my left hand, but at least, the teachers were understanding. I’m pretty sure Kujaku or Kimidori would beat someone up if they tried to bother me for that anyway, so… yeah. It’s just a little tedious when I make typos. You know you’d usually highlight something to remove or correct it? I can’t do that now. It’s a little weird, but I’ll get used to it. </em>(You wished him good luck, wishing you could give him <em>your</em> right arm).</p><p><em>They removed my sling, today. </em>(That’s awesome!) <em>I thought I’d be able to use my arm again, which was made me so excited for it, but… </em>(But?) <em>I can’t move my arm. I don’t know how to describe it well without showing you, but it’s all floppy, it’s like I’m a puppet without its strings. Actually, lemme send you a video once I’m done with homework. You may even find it funny, considering how silly it looks. Plus, unlike Toda, you won’t get the smell of my sling. That’s a win-win to me. </em>(You received the video earlier. You didn’t dare tell him you laughed your head off at the sight of his roommate demonstrating how floppy that arm was).</p><p><em>So I got sent to re-education so my arm can be used again. Lemme tell you, it <strong>hurts</strong>, but hey, the fact I can even feel pain in there is reassuring in its own way. Not that I like the pain or anything, because who even likes that – </em>(I don’t think you want the answer to that, Tachimukai) <em>– okay, aside from those people I guess – where was I again? </em>(You were telling me about the pain. You’re sure you’re not tired? You sound like you’ve been through a lot). <em>Today’s been a long day, but I still have a book to finish, so… Yeah, I need to hang up, dinner’s soon. Talk to you later! </em>(You wondered how he could read with only one hand but didn’t ask him until remembering that question like three weeks later when yourself reading a book for biology class).</p><p><em>Re-education is difficult, but I’m getting there. Today, I managed to grab a pen for a second or two. It sounds so silly to be happy about that, but hey, it’s something already, right? </em>(Of course! You’re 100% getting somewhere dude!) <em>It’s painful, but if it means I can gain back my autonomy… then I’ll do this. We’ve been through worse, right? </em>(Absolutely! We kicked aliens’ asses back in junior high, you can do anything!). <em>They weren’t really aliens, but… Actually, you know what? You’re right. </em>(You cheered him on as loudly as possible).</p><p><em>I managed to write something with my hand, today – I mean, with my right hand, and with a pen. Again, it must sound so silly to you be happy about writing your own surname on a dorm registry, but… simple joys, I guess? </em>(Dude. You’ve just spent four months being unable to do anything with your hand, of course you’re gonna be happy to use it again!) <em>Well, you’re right on that. I hope I can do more impressive stuff soon though! </em>(You urged him not to overdo it, reminiscing about some junior high days…).</p><p><em>My practician’s told me today I was finally finished with re-education. I still can’t use my shoulder like I’d have before for soccer, because it’s too fragile for that at the moment, but… there’s no reason to give up now, is there? </em>(I’ll pay you a visit asap! I need to see that with my own two eyes!) <em>Oh, of course, no problem on my end there! Just warn me ahead so my place won’t be a mess!</em></p><p> </p><p>Despite the fact it’s been your fault from the very beginning, you feel an undeniable sense of <em>pride</em>.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>It turns out <em>you</em> were Tachimukai’s emergency number all along.</p><p> </p><p>You’re not sure of why the guy decided the man who broke his shoulder last year was the first person to call if he’s in serious troubles or needs help – especially since that man lives in <em>Tokyo</em> to attend university – but on the other hand, you remember that guy also has no adult to even keep an eye on him (he’s always spoken about that so nonchalantly, as if that’s a normal thing to have been through during your childhood – it’s not, and he can remember Otonashi dropping her board when he told them about it), so at this point, you may as well be said adult.</p><p>In a way, it’s an opportunity to fix your fault from last year: he’s trusted you with his life, at that point.</p><p> </p><p>Otonashi, who actually was the one to call you with his phone (and being unable to access it, thus why you panicked at the sight of an urgent call, it’s not like you get those often – or ever, actually), must have also been suspicious of that considering the bizarre conversation you two had over the phone; though, honestly, considering the circumstances of her call, you’d have probably sounded as speechless and unsure as she did.</p><p>The fact she even had the reflexes to bring him to where her brother and she were staying over for the summer holidays and to call whom she’d have assumed to be his legal guardian when in a city she didn’t know with someone whose body temperature was off the roof and kept hallucinating weird things is a feat in itself and you can’t deny her that – that’d explain why she was his third (and last) emergency contact.</p><p> </p><p>You rushed to Fukuoka without even taking a moment to think about it (bought a ticket, boarded the train, called Otonashi for directions, got where she stayed over without even getting lost), abandoning all and every plan for your day off work. Something simply compelled you to get there – the taste of last year’s fatal error, most likely – like a ghost haunting you, possessing your body until you found yourself in a city you’ve barely ever been in before without him.</p><p>What awaited you was just as bad as you expected it to be: a clearly concerned Kidou, an even more concerned Otonashi (and much more openly too, though that was to be expected), a butler who calls you “Mr Tsunami”, and your friend lying in bed, sweating profusely, whiter than seafoam, rattled by violent coughing fits.</p><p> </p><p>You’re the only adult in the room, since the butler (Hanzou, you think his name is, but you only heard Kidou mention it once) has gone out to shop for groceries, so you feel like you should be the responsible one in this situation; but your own brain is seized by concern, so you’re sitting right next to Otonashi and the bed, Kidou looking like the oldest party by standing in a corner, arms crossed. You can’t see each other’s faces because you’re all wearing masks in here, but you’re certain he’s frowning under his, because so are you.</p><p>The air in the room is hot and heavy, almost like that of a swamp. It could be due to the fact you’re all sharing it with someone who’s past sick, or it could be because nobody really knows what to say – it’s probably both.</p><p> </p><p>Otonashi is the first to break the tension.</p><p>“We were really surprised when we tried to call for his emergency contact and found out it was you. From what we could see on his phone,” (she grabs it from the bedside table and shows you), “we couldn’t tell who it was, so when I heard your voice… We realized how unreliable his parents really were. Thank goodness you could show up, though, at least he’s got you! Well, you, his dormmate, Yuuto and me; but you were his first emergency contact, right?”</p><p>“Yeah, and that’s what I don’t get. I’d have thought he’d have Toda as that contact, y’know? He lives closer, it makes more sense. I mean, not that I wouldn’t have skipped class or taken a day off work if it meant helping him, but still… I’d like to know what’s running through that guy’s mind.”</p><p>“I think you’ll have to wait for a little while, Tsunami”, Kidou interjects. “Tachimukai still isn’t coherent. All you’d get by asking him right now would be nonsense.”</p><p>“Shit, that’s bad, isn’t it?”</p><p> </p><p>As you glance back at him, you realize something: you can see, due to the open buttoned-up shirt he’s wearing, a reddish line going from the clavicle to under his right sleeve, skin risen a little, the vague silhouette of stitches showing. You have no wonder as to what it can be, of course, because the answer is beyond obvious in that regard – and that’s when it comes back.</p><p>The feeling of failure, the taste of broken dreams, the chill of guilt – and you wonder once more why Tachimukai chose you as his emergency contact all over again after you had finally reasoned yourself a little (being the one adult he knows just doesn’t cut it when the proof of your fault is right in front of your eyes, available for all to see).</p><p>“I don’t get it,” escapes your lips.</p><p> </p><p>Otonashi immediately picks up on it, of course.</p><p>“You don’t get what?”</p><p>“Why he chose me as an emergency contact in the first place. He’s got to stare at that scar every single day and he still… he still did that. He still trusts me not to hurt him. I don’t get that.”</p><p>Her brother and she look at each other for a moment, silent, before she focuses back on you. In her eyes, you see the same flame that burnt when she was telling him about how he deserved better than to be virtually abandoned by his own family.</p><p>“If your places had been switched, would you have not done the same?”</p><p> </p><p>Well… It’s difficult to imagine Tachimukai as a midfielder– you’ve heard he used to be one before Raimon went down in Football Frontier history four years ago, but that’s it, you’ve barely gotten to see him play as one (that one bizarre time during the FFI doesn’t count) – but, well… He wouldn’t have done it on purpose. Hell, knowing him, he’d have tried to make up for it tenfold, even if that’d have worried you because who knows what the little guy is capable of doing –</p><p>Oh. <em>That’s</em> why, isn’t it?</p><p> </p><p>Otonashi is smiling now, despite the way her eyebrows press against her eyes.</p><p>“I’m sure you see where I’m coming from, Tsunami.”</p><p>“Yeah. I should’ve thought of it sooner. Goddammit, I’m an idiot.”</p><p>You chuckle at the face of your own stupidity for a bit, before remembering you’re supposed to be an adult in this situation.</p><p> </p><p>That’s the least you can do, considering where and how this all started.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>You’re staring at Tachimukai going through his college applications results, on a warm day of summer in Fukuoka (he looks oddly adult, doing that, kind of like Dad when he’d go through bills and school paperwork). His right shoulder has fully recovered – or so it seems –, so he’s easily browsing papers. Under the collar of his shirt, you can see a little of the scar. No matter how much you try to ignore it, it keeps coming back to you as long as it’s visible, especially since, right now, you’re both silent.</p><p>He didn’t expect your visit because you forgot to send your text to him before boarding the train and may have forgotten to check after that, thus leading to his panic when he realized he had left all of his papers on the table in the dining room (at least, you <em>assume</em> it’s the dining room – you’ve never been here before today). It’s oddly large, for a place where only one person lives. Creates a threatening aura of emptiness.</p><p> </p><p>“I still can’t believe I was actually accepted by InaUni in their advanced lit course,” he eventually says. “I honestly thought they’d put me on a waiting list.”</p><p>“Dude. Knowing you, you grinded your ass off to get in there. Of course they accepted you!”</p><p>A thought flashes in your mind, almost as quick as thunder in a bottle.</p><p>“Actually, why did you choose lit? I wouldn’t have thought of you as the bookworm type.”</p><p>“I’ve never told you?” His surprise is genuine and, come to think of it, you’re the same. “I’ve been reading ever since I could, and when, you know, I couldn’t play for a while… I fell back into reading. So, you know, I thought… why not? I could at least give it an earnest shot.”</p><p> </p><p>His slight frown doesn’t leave his face, however, even as he’s putting his papers back on the table. From where you are, you can see a list of what you assume are other universities, courses and responses; but Tachimukai’s handwriting is so scratchy it’s difficult to tell. Not being able to write for a couple months can’t have helped. Nevertheless, his frown is what’s bothering you, not the hard-to-read kanji, so let’s forget about that handwriting thing.</p><p>“You sound a little bothered, though. Aren’t you happy to have gotten in a selective course like that?”</p><p>“Oh, I am! It’s just… I’m worried about housing. I’ve heard the area around the university is expensive, and, well… I don’t have much money; I think you’ve known that for a while.” You remember that – <em>I couldn’t afford medicine for my worsening pneumonia – </em>yeah (how could you <em>not</em>?). “I think I’ll just have to settle down for the regular literature course in Fukuoka Uni. At least, I can keep this flat, and—”</p><p>Another dash of ideas rushes to your mind.</p><p>“Hey, I’ve got a solution to that! I need to move flats due to my landlord prioritizing his daughter or something, but the only affordable one I found is for two people, and my bros aren’t gonna attend InaUni, so… wanna be my flatmate?”</p><p> </p><p>The astonishment on his face is absolutely unbeatable. He’s always had an expressive face, but man, every single time you think he can’t get more expressive, he beats you to the punch. What a guy.</p><p>“You’re… You’re serious?!”</p><p>“Well… Yeah, I am? I know it’s rare, but I’m serious.”</p><p>“You’re sure? I mean—”</p><p>“<em>Dude</em>. Lemme <em>do</em> that for you, at least. I can’t let yourself shy away from something you really wanna study just cause you can’t find a flat when I can give you just that.”</p><p>He holds his shoulder, almost like a reflex; but he’s smiling. A little reluctantly, you’d assume, but hey, it’s something already.</p><p>“That’s a really generous offer, considering I don’t have a stable income or anything, I—”</p><p>“That ain’t a problem, you can just find some when you’ll be in Tokyo! I know a place where we need new hands now that someone’s graduated, so there, problem fixed!”</p><p> </p><p>He crumbles into a flustering mess, but soon enough, he manages to get a grip back on himself.</p><p>“As long as you want me around… then I can’t refuse a chance like that.”</p><p>That smile… You recognize it. The last time you saw it was when you two faced each other during that fateful match. Before the incident. Before everything went down the drain.</p><p>“Then it’s a deal!”</p><p> </p><p>It’s over.</p><p> </p><p>You’ve paid back your debt.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I don't know when I started to write older Tachimukai like I'd write Shindo from KazeTsuyo, but I'm never coming back on that decision, ever, as stupid as it makes me.</p><p>also yeah, liking the technique names in there? there's some actual background behind them!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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